I know my role...

I remember when I was in middle school, and starting to get into teenage trouble, we always had a couple of houses that we would go to to get into trouble and do things we weren't supposed to. It was either the friend's house with the "cool" mom who would either turn the other cheek to the things we weren't supposed to be doing, or the friend's house with the parents that worked so much they were never home. I saw it then, I saw it in high school, and I continue to see it in my adult life. I don't ever want to be either one of these parents. I don't want to be the "cool" mom. I am a mother. My job is to be just that. My job is not to be Natalie's friend when she is a teenager and let her do things she shouldn't do just so she will "love" me and think I'm "cool". I don't care if her friends don't like me because I am too strict. I don't care if she yells and breaks my heart 100 times when she tells me how much I am ruining her life by not letting her do some of the things she wants to do. I know the time will come when she will hate me. I did it to my mom. My mom was so strict and even then I did so much stupid crap that I almost wish she would have caught me doing so that maybe it would have kept ne from doing even stupider crap. she didn't let me date until I was 15. I couldn't wear make-up until I was almost in high school. I wasn't allowed to wear all the clothes my other friends were wearing. I wasn't allowed to do a lot of things. And I hated her for it sometimes. She was always in my business. She had to talk to parents if I was staying the night somewhere. She screened my calls. My mom trusted no body. And I hated her for it. I remember breaking my mom's heart several times, and even my dad's on some occasions because I would tell them I didn't want to live there anymore. It wasn't because they were bad parents, they just weren't "cool" parents like some of my other friends had. Now that I am grown up and married and have a daughter of my own, I want to raise her just the same. Because now that I look back at it, if my mom had been the cool mom, my life would not be what it is right now. She was tough, but she taught me respect and she taught me morals. I may have hated her then some days, but now I love her that much more for raising me right and not being my friend, but my mother because that is what I needed. I still know some of those friends that had the cool parents growing up, and they don't even talk to them anymore because they were so caught up being their friend that they didn't know how to value the relationship between a child and a parent. When Natalie is an adult I want her to be able to look back and be proud of me and the job I did as her mother, not be embarrassed because I didn't fit the role. I hope that I can raise her to be respectful of others and herself, to know how important education and work ethic are in real life, to know the meaning of family and the sanctity of a marriage. I hope she will know how important it is to be her children's mother rather than their friend, and to never let work become a priority over family. I hope she will follow the example I have set for her and not move in with just any man and get married before she has babies, but also know that if she messes up I will be there for her and love her just the same. I especially hope that she knows and loves our amazing God. That alone will give me peace because I know that if she loves God she will head in the right direction, even if she takes a few wrong turns.
Basically what I'm saying is that I'm ready. I am ready to fulfill my role as a mother. I know it wil be hard, so I'm glad I still have a few years before she starts "hating" me. But hopefully she won't hate me too much. I know that in the long run she is going to love me more than ever for being the mother she needed me to be, not the friends she wanted me to be.

~Garit~

I feel like everywhere I look there are little kids battling this horrible demon called cancer. I remember meeting sweet Brennan and not giving him that hug I wanted to give him that day and how badly I regretted it afterwards. Well today at the Water's Edge () a few of the leaders and other members gathered in front of everyone to lift Garit Morrison up in prayer. Garit is five years old and has stage 4 adrenocortical carcinoma. He began his battle with cancer on October 25, 2010 and is currently on his 8th round of chemo, but still has a long road ahead of him. I was in tears during the prayer for Garit, and after service was over I looked all over until I found him. I will not forget his face when I finally found him. He had a smile that lit up the room and as soon as I put my hand on his back, he stretched out his arms and gave me the biggest hug. I didn't want to let go. The whole time I was hugging him I was praying to God that he would heal this little boy and give his parents strength. I didn't get a chance to meet his parents, but I wish I could have. I wanted to tell them that they are not alone in this fight. That I may not be in their position and I may not be in Garit's position, but I am in the position where I know how big our God is and the miracles only He can bring. I am so blessed to have met this little man today. After service he was outside on his bike that is being built for his benefit. He was so happy on that thing. (I learned today that his bike is almost finished, they just need a little more money. If you would like to donate, please go to paypal and enter Garitsfight@yahoo.com to donate for his cancer awareness bike). Chad and I watched him on the bike for a while with tears in our eyes, and Chad took Natalie over to give him a hug. I couldn't hold back the tears. Why is this happening to such a sweet, innocent little boy? Why not me? Why not someone else who has lived their life? Why such a sweet little boy? It was so sweet watching him on that bike. It was like his cancer was no biggie for him. He had this smile on his face that showed the world, "I am a child of God....He is taking care of me and I am not scared". His happiness and strength touched me and I admire him so much for his strength. Natalie wanted to sit on the bike also, so we sat her behind Garit and the tears flowed even more. I am so thankful to have a healthy baby girl that lights up my life. I wish all parents had healthy kids...I wish Cancer would just disappear and stop attacking so many sweet babies...
I hope that those of you that read this can join me in praying for Garit and his family. I believe he has a brother and a sister who may not be fighting the same battle he is, but they are fighting his battle with him. I can't imagine how hard this has to be on their family. I wish I could have hugged them all today. I can't stop thinking about them, and I am definitely not going to stop praying for them. God's love is everlasting and overflowing and I pray that He wrap his arms around Garit and his family and help them kick cancer's butt!!!!!!!