Poop

This title seems fitting since that is really all that has been on my mind the past few days...Natalie hadn't had a dirty diaper going on four days yesterday. She had wet diapers, just no poopy diapers. So being the worried and paranoid parents that we are, Chad and I took her to the doctor yesterday. Turns out that it is normal for a breast fed baby to not have a bowel movement for a couple of days. But she would still strain and she had belly aches because of it, so we had giver her something to help her poop. That was not fun. My poor baby...but she feels so much better now, and I can tell her belly doesn't hurt as bad. This morning she really left us a little gift (not so little) in her diaper. She needed it I'm sure. So, there...a not so pleasant post about a not so pleasant experience. I hope she doesn't have this problem again. Poor thing.

On the flip side...my parents came in for the weekend to visit. I missed them like crazy. I was so happy to have them here. They actually babysat for us last night while Chad and I went to dinner with a client. We had crawfish and it was YUMMY!!! We had a good time. Met some new friends and ate some good food.

My parents left this morning...I wish I was going with them. I miss my family like crazy (it's worse on some days). I am just still not used to being so far away from them.

For the most part, it was a good weekend. We have our church group to go to tonight to discuss "Crazy Love" some more. I can't wait....

More Milk Please

Good morning! It's a beautiful day out today...I think I may take Ms. Natalie out for a walk. She is 7 weeks old today! I can't believe how fast the time is flying! It doesn't seem like it has been that long. Seven weeks...the best seven weeks of my life so far. I can't imagine not having her here. It's amazing how much being a mother changes you. I am no longer thinking about what is best for Chad and I, it's what's best for Natalie. We have been stressing out a little the past week...my milk supply began to dry up a bit, and we don't want to have to give her any formula just yet. My plan is to give her only breast milk for at least a year. At least that is what we want to do....not sure how that is all going to work out. Chad has been stressing out about it a lot, which is weird since he is a guy, and I didn't think they cared lol. In turn, he stresses me out even more. I know that he doesn't do it intentionally, and I should be thankful that he cares so much and is so involved instead of getting stressed out and upset about it. He went to talk to a lactation specialist yesterday to see if there was anything he could do to help. They told him it would help to take this herbal pill 4 times a day. It's called "More Milk Plus". I started taking it today and they said it should take about 3 days to increase my milk supply. I hope it works. It is so depressing as a mom that is so gung ho (is that how you spell that?) about breastfeeding to not be able to produce enough to feed your child. I feel like I am failing as a mother. I know...it happens a lot. Some women just don't produce enough milk. BUT my problem is that I got sick and took Benadryl. I dried up my milk supply. I could have prevented it. It's MY fault. So, God, if you could please, forgive my ignorance in not looking up information about medicine before taking it just this one time, and give me some more milk. Please? Natalie is becoming a little fatty and she is growing quick...she needs more milk. I would really appreciate it. Thanks!

Here's proof that she's getting big!

Chunky Butt

We took Natalie to the doctor yesterday...she has a cold. My poor baby. The medicine they gave her seemed to help her sleep well at least. She is gaining some weight. Chad and I have been a little concerned about her maybe not getting enough to eat, because the Benadryl I took the other day dried my supply some, but she is gaining weight and doing great, so that made us feel a little better. She weighs 8lbs 15oz!!! She is in the 50th percentile for weight, and the 90th percentile for height, which is now 22in!!! My little girl is getting big!! It's hard to think that some babies are born this big...and bigger!!
Last night we reached a milestone...her first bath without throwing a fit! Chad gave her a bath, and instead of hearing the screams as she went in the water, there was silence...the WHOLE TIME! She loved it, and Chad was loving the fact that she was loving it...as was I. Bath time used to break my heart almost every night, because she acted like we were doing something horrible to her. But now she likes bath time...at least I hope. We will see if she continues to like it again tonight. (crossing my fingers)

Booger Baby

Well, it's happened, and I feel like a horrible mom...Natalie is sick. She started with somewhat of a stuffy nose last night and when she woke up crying to eat a few minutes ago, she was mostly breathing through her mouth because her nose was so runny! My poor baby. She has this different cry...it sounds so sad. I think she's saying "bad mommy" for obviously not taking care of her as well as I should be. Right? Because if I did, she wouldn't be sick...at least that is how I feel. It breaks my heart to hear her little nose every time she tries to breathe. I sat there and suctioned out as much as I could...it's pretty bad. I hope that she gets better soon. I don't want her to feel bad...ever. I know, I can't keep her in a bubble, although sometimes I really wish I could. I used to make fun of those mothers, you know, the germaphobes that don't want anyone or anything that hasn't basically bleached and sanitized their whole bodies around their baby??? Yeah, that's me...guilty. My poor child...she has a crazy mother.

I guess I will go back to bed now...Daddy is taking care of his little girl, and as much as I want to rip her out of his arms and take her into mine, I know he wants to take care of her as much as I do...so I am going to go back to bed. Maybe not back to sleep...but at least back to bed.

If you're reading this, say a little prayer for my baby to better and for all those boogers to go away. Thanks!

“The worst moment for the atheist is when he is really thankful and has nobody to thank”

I just got home from a delicious steak dinner with my two brothers-in-law and Natalie. She was pretty well behaved at dinner...only a couple of crying episodes, but because she was hungry. Once I fed her she was great. I love her.
I have been thinking a lot this week about the last topic at our small group. One of the questions "Crazy Love" asks is 'What would be the first thing you would say to the Lord as you were standing before his throne?' Right away, the words 'thank you' came to my head. I have so much to be thankful for. My life has made a complete 180 in the past 5 or so years...I have made a complete 180. I have an amazing family, great friends, and have been blessed with a wonderful husband who loves me and loves God, and the most beautiful little girl that will grow up to know God and all that he has and will continue to bless her with. I am healthy for the most part, I am happy, and I am alive. Not just living, but truly ALIVE. So yes, the one most important thing I would have to say to our wonderful God as I stood before him would definitely be THANK YOU. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for this wonderful life you have given me, and thank you for loving me like only You can.
My 'thank you' would be followed by 'I'm sorry'. I'm sorry for taking it for granted so many times. I'm sorry for being selfish, and sometimes vain, and for forgetting that my life is not really mine. I'm sorry for trying to take a few turns in the opposite direction you were leading. I'm sorry for maybe not loving you enough.
So there it is....that is what I would say. What would you say?

It's time for me to try to clean up a little around the house (yes, at 10:30pm). Natalie is sleeping...for a little while at least...so I am going to take advantage of that and maybe get something done around here. I hate seeing my house in such a mess.

Signing out,

Moooooooooo

That is what I feel like...a cow. In every sense of the word. We've had a pretty hard time getting Natalie to sleep at night....but when we do get her to sleep, she sleeps through the night....most of the time. So I don't wake her up to eat, but since I am breastfeeding, I still have to get up and pump. I have to admit, I haven't been doing it lately, and it is really necessary to keep up my milk supply, so I am going to try harder to wake up even when she is sound asleep.
It is really important to both Chad and I to breastfeed Natalie rather than giver her formula because of all the benefits it has for her. So for as long as the good Lord gives me milk...or until she can talk (whichever comes first) Mommy's milk will be the only thing on the menu. That is, until I start introducing solids. :o)

So back to the cow thing...it's so amazing how God built women to be such "natural providers" for their children, but really, I feel like a cow. I've never milked a cow before, and I'm sure that cows aren't necessarily milked with pumps, but if I had and if they were, I'm sure this is what it would feel/look like. I have lost most of my pregnancy weight, but still haven't managed to lose all of it, so I decided to start weight watchers tomorrow and try to fit in some exercise during the day even if that means just taking a walk in the park with Natalie on most days. I really want to get back down to the size I was before (and smaller). I am going to set my goal to lose 10 lbs this month. Then I will set another goal for the next month, so wish me luck.

I am clocking back out for another 3 hours...back to dreamland I go.

"The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing”

This is sooo true...Chad is a lucky man that he works most of the day and doesn't have to be here to listen to me almost break windows while I'm singing to our daughter. I could do it forever though. I sometimes wonder if it hurts her ears as much as it hurts everyone else's, but then I look down and see her sleeping so peacefully and realize that all that matters to her is that she hears my voice and that I am close to her. I fed her and put her down for a nap. This is the time where everyone says I should also sleep, but I always sit there and stare at her for a few minutes after she falls asleep and somehow the sleepiness goes away and I am filled with this wonderful feeling. Being a mom has already exhausted me to no end and it's only been 6 weeks, but I wouldn't change it for the world. It is the most rewarding job I've had in my life...
She started smiling this week. Really smiling. She was smiling the first week she was born, but I don't think she knew what was going on around her. Now she smiles sometimes when I talk to her and play with her. It melts my heart to see that smile. It's already got me hooked and it's contagious. She smiles, and both Chad and I smile...
He is great with her...and with me...sometimes I think I don't deserve how great he is to me. I can be a little difficult to deal with. I am trying to get better...I am. But for now, he still puts up with me and is great with us. Watching him hold Natalie and talk to her is probably as equally amazing as just watching her, if not more. He gets this look on his face that I have never seen. It somewhat resembles the look he had on his face as I was walking down the isle to him, but different. He loves her...It shows in his eyes how much he loves her. It's amazing to watch them...amazing.



I am going to get something to eat before she wakes up again...maybe I will have some more to write later. I am sure that now I will keep my promise to write more...I have so much to share about Natalie that I don't want to keep inside.

Truly Blessed,

My last apology...

Wow, it's been a while since I have posted anything...I am sorry, once more. So much is new in my life...I gave birth to a beautiful little princess on December 9, 2009. Natalie Andrea Carroll weighed 6lbs, 8oz and was 19.5 inches long. She was 6 weeks old yesterday and I am loving every day with her. I could sit here and stare at her all day...she is so amazingly beautiful. God is so great....
I was registered for school this semester, and was planning on just taking 6 hours, but one of my classes got canceled last minute and there was no space available in any of the other classes. Soooo, I decided to just take the semester off, even though that is not really what I wanted to do. The good thing is that at least I will be able to stay home with my little angel and won't miss any of the "firsts". It also gives me some time to blog everyday hopefully. I think this will be a good way to document Natalie's first "coo" and first giggle, first word...I can't wait. Being a wife in itself was great, and now being a mommy is an even greater feeling. I thank God everyday for the family he has blessed me with. My husband and my daughter are my life and my heart, and everyday I wake up I thank God for allowing me another day with them.
Chad and I joined a small group at our church and met some wonderful people who I hope will be in our lives for a long time. In our group we are reading a book called "Crazy Love". I have only read two chapters, but so far this book is amazing and it really makes you think about life, yourself and God in a completely different way. I highly recommend it so far.

Well, mommy duty calls...Natalie is hungry. I will write more a little later.

Hope everyone is having a great day!